Per the request from some of the students who attended the 1/11/12 “Candlelight Yin & Restoratives” class, here are some of last evening’s readings:

“The pauses in our life make our experience full, and meaningful. The well known pianist Arthur Rubenstein was once asked – how do you handle the notes as well as you do? His response was immediate and passionate:
‘I handle the notes no better than many others – but the pauses – ah! That is where the art resides.’

Like a rest note in a musical score, the pure stillness of a pause forms the background that lets the foreground take shape with clarity and freshness. The moment that arises out of the pause, can, like the well sounded note reflect the genuineness, the wholeness, and the truth of who we are. In the midst of a pause, we are giving room and attention to the life that is constantly streaming through us. A life often habitually overlooked.” ~ from the book “Radical Acceptance” by Tara Brach

Mindful
by Mary Oliver

Every day
I see or hear
something
that more or less

kills me
with delight,
that leaves me
like a needle

in the haystack
of light.
It was what I was born for -
to look, to listen,

to lose myself
inside this soft world -
to instruct myself
over and over

in joy,
and acclamation.
Nor am I talking
about the exceptional,

the fearful, the dreadful,
the very extravagant –
but of the ordinary,
the common, the very drab,

the daily presentations.
Oh, good scholar,
I say to myself,
how can you help

but grow wise
with such teachings
as these -
the untrimmable light

of the world,
the ocean’s shine,
the prayers that are made
out of grass?

And from Noah Levine’s book, “Against the Stream”:

Loving Kindness Meditation~
“May I be happy.”
“May I be at peace.”
“May I be free from suffering.”

Appreciative Joy Meditation~
“May I learn to appreciate the happiness and joy I experience.”
“May the joy I experience continue and grow.”
“May I be filled with gratitude.”

Equanimity Meditation
“All beings are responsible for their own actions.”
“Suffering or happiness is created through one’s relationship to experience, not by experience itself.”
“The freedom or happiness of others is dependent on their actions, not on my wishes for them.”

A mother and daughter strengthen their special bond by practicing yoga together. Independently, they wrote about their experience. Together, they reached the same conclusion.

From Laurel Alyn-Forest:

Yoga was my mom’s thing. I would see her practicing at home and hear about classes she’d attended, but I was a bit hesitant to come along with her to a class. I have always been pretty athletic but flexibility was never my strong suit. I would joke around with my younger ballet-dancing sister, pretending to touch my toes or straighten my legs in the air. I knew I wanted to improve.

Since graduating from college a year ago, my life has changed in many ways. After spending a summer in a national park and a few months travelling, I was back at home searching for a job. I had expressed a greater interest in giving yoga a try now that I was out of school but had limited funds being an unemployed recent graduate back from travelling. Being the insightful and thoughtful person my mom is, she got me a yoga top along with a starter pass and 10-class pass at Sellwood Yoga for Christmas! I was very excited to begin my practice and also a bit nervous about being new at something I knew would present challenges along the way.

After completing my starter pass I picked a couple classes I felt were best for me and began going a couple days a week. One of these classes was the Monday night Yoga for Athletes which I attended with my mom. Despite living together, our schedules were often so different we hardly got any time to catch up or hang out! Our Monday night yoga was something to look forward to: a time we could connect on the short walk to and from the studio and enjoy together. My mom has been a confidence booster for me by noticing my improvements and has encouraged me and laughed with me in difficulties.

I began to LOVE the way I felt both physically and emotionally from yoga. Now that I have a job and will be moving out soon, I don’t doubt that I will continue to honor our Monday night yoga tradition. My mom and I have always been very close but transitioning from being a dependent to being more independent is a big change for both of us. I feel lucky that yoga continues to bring us together and is something special we will continue to share.

From Kathy Wolff:

Last May my daughter, Laurel, graduated from college. The month preceding had been a whirlwind of weekend trips up to Tacoma: senior vocal recital, final concert, and graduation weekend. Within days of her move back home she left to work at Glacier National Park for the summer. In September she returned home for a week with just enough time to repack her bags before leaving for travel in Europe. Every adventure of hers has two meanings for me; deep appreciation and gratitude for all her life is offering along with a wistfulness (and, truth be told, some trepidation) at watching her go! My yoga practice has been a steadying force in my life through the comings and goings and as this role of parenting transforms with a child reaching adulthood.

Laurel returned from her travels just before the winter holidays with responsibilities looming and in a moment of parental insight, I bought a Sellwood Yoga class card for her Christmas gift. I wanted to offer her the same steadying internal connection that I’d found through my yoga practice. Laurel is an avid volleyball player, was part of a ultimate Frisbee team in college, and is an outdoor enthusiast. She’s strong, and quick, and loves action. So, yoga was going to be different. Still, she seemed genuinely excited about her gift.

It meant so much to me to see the wonderful way Laurel was greeted when she first arrived at the studio and how she has been supported in finding her own way at Sellwood Yoga. Now, we attend Savonn’s Monday night class together each week. Sharing yoga with my adult daughter has provided me with a path to more graceful parenting at this stage in our relationship. There are so many lessons and metaphors for life we can explore from our practices on the mat: breathe, be flexible, find balance, build your strength, don’t compare yourself to others, nurture yourself, find quiet, listen carefully, and, practice compassion. These the exact messages I want to reinforce for my children. Giving my daughter the gift of yoga has been a gift to me too!

“The root of the word courage is cor—the Latin word for heart. In one of its earliest forms, the word courage literally had a very different definition than it does today. Courage originally meant -To speak one’s mind by telling all one’s heart.-”-Brene Brown

The foundation of yesterday’s “Strong Vinyasa” class came from Brene Brown’s TED talk on vulnerability. Lots of gratitude to the amazing women who came to practice. Here’s the video, I was talking about:

As is the ritual in the Candlelight Yin with Restoratives Wednesday evening class, the readings take on a depth and life of their own. There were a few requests for copies of the “Ancestor Blessing” from Tami Kent’s Wild Feminine:

I call on the women and men of my mother line.
I call on the women and men of my father line.
I call on the lineages of those who have supported my journey in this life.
I call on the spirits of this land.
Bring your strength, your beauty, your dreams, your joy to me-the one who now carries on the work of our lineage.
Bring energy and light to my life so that I may do this work of transforming wounds, nurturing hope, celebrating joy and sharing love:
I am building the structures and sowing the seeds of a bountiful life for myself and for all who will come after me.
Know that you life and energy, all of your steps, were a blessing.
May you rest in peace, held by spirti.
The light that you carried lives on.
I honor you, ancestors.
I give thanks for you.
I ask for your blessing, your energy, to flow-
like a sacred river-=through my body and life.

There are three main theories of playing music in a yoga class –not live music, which is another story.

Traditionalists never play any music in class. They are also most likely the ones to yell at you in class while wearing short, tight, black trunks. In the middle you have the people who play music but it’s mostly instrumental or music you’ve likely never heard of or know how to pronounce. And then you have a free for all with teachers who play whatever they like or want. Seemingly every popular or quirky song finding its way onto a yoga playlist for people thinking to themselves “this would be a great song for triangle pose.”

I fall pretty much square in middle with every class now and again in silence. Although I have played music I wouldn’t normally play and have created special playlists to mark occasions in class too so I’m not saying I’ve never done it or looking down my nose at it, but there is a greater byproduct of concern for the future.

In the SF Bay Area—a place I lived for many years- 90% of the residents are DJ’s. They have weekly gigs at off times at local clubs or at their own dinner parties so you get a lot of creative mixes blending different sounds and styles. When they apply this craft to the art of yoga you get the following posts. “Oh yeah, Bananarama, Kool and the Gang Thievery Corp., Lady Gaga, Beyonce and The Cure on tap for tonight’s class. Gonna be epic, see you there.”

While I like many of those bands and enjoy their music, do I really want to hear them in class? No. There are lots of pop, rap and rock artists that I really like and love to listen to, but not in a yoga class. It’s a time and place issue.

For teachers, there’s also the scenario that the stereo doesn’t work, the power goes out, your iPod’s not charged and you can’t play music in class. Now what? Suddenly you have to teach and not rely on the music to create an ambiance for a pose or sequence. If you’re not used to it or in many cases, never done it since a teacher training program, you’re suddenly in unfamiliar territory. It’s so quiet in here, what’s going on. The class seems “off” for everyone when it should feel natural.

Sequencing music for yoga that is neither new age nor pop music is very hard. There are many songs that are appropriate for class for two thirds of the way through only to shift dramatically to screeching guitars and drums of war near the end. You can spend hours and not get anywhere. I get bored with the music I play sometimes too. If you aren’t careful you create a spa like trance for the class that makes people just want to roll around on their mats or sleep.*

When I moved to Portland I went ahead and “gave myself permission” as we say in yoga to make a playlist of music that I liked or thought was significant and a meaningful way to end an important chapter of my life.

It was the Tuesday night class so Tuesday’s Gone by Lynard Skynard was on there. Loretta Lynne’s famous Portland, Oregon made the cut as well for obvious reasons. As soon as Skynard’s “Train roll on….” came on, I immediately booked myself a 1st class cabin on a long trip down memory lane. “This is a great song,,,wish I got to see them live. Would be a lot like the Allman Bros I bet. Best Allman Bros concert ever was at Redrock 91’, 92’ or 93’ I can’t remember. Oh yeah, right there’s a class going on here. 2nd side.

By the time “well Portland Oregon and Slow Gin Fizz, if that aint’ love than tell me what is Uh Huh!,” came on, everyone laughed, but not in a good way. Slow Gin Fizz, who would drink those, what’s in it? Its red? Never had to make them when I bartended and so on.

Pop music with lyrics and any music that is easily identifiable with most of the people in the class is distracting. Its either good (Spring Break song!) bad (Ugh. Madonna again) melancholy (Sarah Smith broke up with me to this song) or loud (I can’t hear) for teachers and students. In a discipline whose main doctrines are presence and focus, music ultimately can serve as the common class distraction.

Let us remember music is a wonderful accompaniment to yoga but be careful what you play or you’ll have students in class humming along to the Velvet Underground’s What goes on in your mind, I think that I am falling down all around you.

*Fortunately today, I have a nice student who has a real ear for new music for yoga and he drops off cd’s every now and then. Thanks Morgan if you read this.

At the end of last year, the Hindu American Foundation launched a “campaign” called “Take Back Yoga” that essentially encouraged people to recognize the influence Hinduism has had on the modern yoga world.

Launched quite peacefully through its own website and various scholarly publications, the campaign ignited some controversy and reaction from Deepak Chopra and others who took issue with the campaign’s interpretation of the history of yoga–namely when yoga actually began. (Most people, including myself were taught that the creation of yoga began in the Vedic age, long before the start of Hinduism.) How do you take back yoga when you didn’t create it? they asked and then largely dismissed the campaign as a case of misguided Hindu nationalism.

“In a way,” said Dr. Aseem Shukla, the Hindu American Foundation’s co-founder, “our issue is that yoga has thrived, but Hinduism has lost control of the brand.”

Yoga is real, powerful, and mysterious. I can say with the utmost respect that yoga has been a real blessing in my life for many different reasons at different times. I have been fortunate to meet many really wonderful people in ways I never would have without practicing yoga—in its many forms of study, teaching and personal practice.

Yoga has also positively influenced the overall health, minds and bodies of millions of others. At the same time yoga has grown so fast without boundaries that it’s hard to get a handle on what is happening these days.

Someone was bound to say something.

Crazy, Sexy Skinny Bitch Yoga, Golden Buns Yoga Booty, Kick Your Asana, Giggle Yoga, Not Yoga Yoga, Sculptasana, Yoga & Whistling, Hoga, Toga Yoga. I wouldn’t be surprised to be invited to a yoga and Hippity Hop class on Facebook soon.

Yoga has thrived, but yoga has lost control of the brand.

It’s for people who wouldn’t normally try yoga because they aren’t into traditional formalities like Sanskrit language, chanting or rules, People say. Nobody owns yoga so it’s not breaking any law.

True, the great thing about yoga is that anyone can do it and that there are enough caring teachers and places out there offering yoga. There’s nothing wrong with specialty classes, being lighthearted and having fun. But it gets to the point where you start combining any activity with yoga and place it before or after the name yoga and suddenly it’s a new kind of yoga? Or does it start watering down a product so much that it starts to change it into something else entirely?
I want yoga to continue to grow and make an authentic, positive impact on even more people. Twenty years from now, I want to see yoga integrated into health care treatments to help cancer patients not be remembered the same way when you say the words step aerobics today.

I’m glad the Hindu American Foundation said something even though it’s not the way everyone sees it. I’d rather us pay homage to our roots and think a little bit more instead of trying to creatively market yoga into every imaginable activity out there this year.

If we don’t, we may be headed to a place we don’t want to go. In fact, we’re already there.

There is a new Chase Bank commercial of a woman doing standing bow pose, She’s very focused and in great alignment when suddenly, something breaks her attention at the top of her mat. It’s her cell phone of course letting her know her account balance is low. Not to worry, in one graceful move she bends down and transfers money from her phone into her account “keeping her life in balance” as the narrator says and she calmly exits the pose.

B’onlineyoga. Balance your Bills while Balancing your life. Save time. Take time…for yourself.  Bring your own iPhone, iPad or Blackberry.

Think maybe the Hindu American Foundation has a few valid points?

Notes from “Candlelight Yin with Restoratives (CYwR)” 12/1/10

The hope for CYwR, this month, is to provide a receptive, supportive and calming space in order to feel settled, quiet the mind, and restore or replenish. In personalizing the poses, the override was a pose that supported greater ease or access and facilitated a more spacious mental landscape.

Selective excerpts came mostly from an article penned by Edward Espe Brown in the March 2010 issue of Shambhala Sun. You can read the full article online.

The other reading was a carry over from the Thanksgiving morning class. An invitation to allow a clear voice to speak, one from a place of deeper listening and gratitude.

Praying by Mary Oliver

It doesn’t have to be
the blue iris, it could be
weeds in a vacant lot, or a few
small stones: just
pay attention, then patch

a few words together and don’t try
to make them elaborate, this isn’t
a contest but the doorway

into thanks, and a silence in which
another voice may speak

Notes from Wednesday, November 17, 2010 “Candlelight Yin with Restoratives Practice”.

Overall threads for the practice included:

-exploration of Letting Go by Letting Be
-focusing of the exhalation as a way to work with the Ayurvedic perspective of Vata (read Gianna Piccardo’s guidance about the Vata season)

Readings:

Perseverence
Is there a school where Perseverance teaches classes?
I want to meet him face to face and see what he looks like.
I have heard so much about him. It is not that I want his feedback. I am sure he would tell me to “keep working,” and I already know that. It is not just me either. Offhand, I can name at least three friends who are curious as I am. One is a scholar, one is a writer, and the third is a young parent. I would write Perseverance a letter inviting him to come here and teach at the neighborhood school but no one around here knows where he lives or how to find him.

I read somewhere that they were trying to hire him to co-host a PBS serious on the creative process but he would have none of it. Says he is shy in front of cameras. Truth is, he turns down all offers which distract him from his work.

Inspiration
Inspiration is disturbing. She does not believe in guarantees or insurance or strict schedules. She is not interested in how well you write your grant proposal or what you do for a living or why you are too busy to see her. She will be there when you need her but you have to take it on trust. Surrender. She knows when you need her better than you do .

From the Book Of Qualities by J. Ruth Gendler

_________________________________________________________________________

The ancient Masters were profound and subtle.
Their wisdom was unfathomable.
There is no way to describe it;
All we can describe is their appearance.

They were careful
as someone crossing an iced-over stream.
Alert as a warrior in enemy territory.
Courteous as a guest.
Fluid as melting ice.
Shapeable as a block of wood.
Receptive as a valley.
Clear as a glass of water.

Do you have the patience to wait
Till you mud settles and the water is clear?
Can you remain unmoving
Till the right action arises by itself?
The Master doesn’t seek fulfillment.
Not seeking, not expecting,
She is present, and can welcome all things.
-Lao-Tzu
From The Enlightened Heart: An Anthology of Sacred Poetry
________________________________________________________
The Wisdom Blessing
May you chose outrageous actions that challenge who you are and encourage who you are becoming

May you take one step however small, towards that which you have always longed for. Now is the right time.
May you recognized the unique and powerful contribution that you bring to the people whose lives you touch.

May you be as grand and wonderful as you really are ad do things because you want o, not just because you should.

May you celebrate you creativity and find peace and purpose and passion amidst the chaos and suffering.

May you reach towards the spirit with a longing that keeps you present to the miracles available all around you, all the time.

May your faith move any mountains that stand in your way and may your heart be awake and open.

May wisdom be your guide and may love be at the center of all your choices.
-Shiloh Sophia McCloud
____________________________________________________________________________

Practice Sequence: You can link to many of the individual yin poses at Yinyoga.com

1. Yogis choice for a starting position either seated or reclined. Eyes closed, restfully aware.
2. Any forward fold (yin options: butterfly or full fwd. fold). Can also be done more supported with bolster/blanket, etc.
3. Cross legged seated with neck stretches.
4. Child’s pose or Down Dog
5. Sphinx or Seal or resting in a prone position.
6. Passive prone neck stretch (90 seconds each side).
7. Child’s pose either Yin orientation or fully supported as a restorative pose.
8. Half Dragonfly or Half Saddle Pose (with fwd. fold)
9. Full Saddle Pose or Restorative Cobbler’s Pose
10. Choice to stay in #9 or switch to Legs up the Wall
11. Choice to stay in #9 or #10 or end in Savasana.
12. Finish seated.

One of the first students that ever came to Bernal Yoga was a woman named Judy Garlow, who at the age of 58 was also probably the oldest student at the time. Judy had red hair and a black Jade yoga mat with her name written in silver across the top. She was as regular in the Saturday morning Yoga Basics for years. Always one of the first people there and usually quietly out the door at the end. I never knew really knew who she was or too much about her until years later. We just thought Judy was the nicest lady and how great that she practiced yoga every week like that.

Our bonding moment came unexpectedly next to each other in line at the Good Life Grocery. “The Steelers are on Monday Night Football.” I explained nodding to the Sierra Nevada on the scanner breaking the silence. “That’s ok”,she whispered leaning in to fill me in on a secret. “I like to treat myself to a Burger King Whopper after Savonn’s Saturday class sometimes.” Now that’s something you typically don’t hear from yoga students. But Judy grew up in a different era and if anything, her honesty was refreshing.

The Saturday morning Yoga Basics class that Judy came to eventually changed when Savonn moved to Portland. As what happens with all classes when the teacher leaves, the class eventually evolves.

I took over and Judy stuck with it, which was great. The class got a little bit harder and the people started changing around her, but she had her routine and knew her limitations so she was doing fine until one day we noticed Judy wasn’t there, then a few weeks went by and still no Judy. Several weeks later Judy came back a much different person. Judy was diagnosed with an aggressive form of brain cancer.

We watched her health decline rapidly from week to week. I started to get concerned as she often became disoriented in class. She would mistakenly sit on the yoga mat next to hers or have a hard time finding her footing leaving the studio.

When the decision was made that she should only take Restorative or Gentle Yoga classes with the support of a friend she told us “the Saturday class is the only thing that makes me feel good, like I’m normal and this is not happening to me right now.”
How do you deny someone the right to practice yoga when all they want to do is come to feel “normal”? You don’t.

As much as our decision to try and limit her practice was for her personal safety, we couldn’t refuse her desire to be there for the sake of being there. And so began my journey of watching a student rapidly lose her battle with cancer week by week.

It was a courageous effort on Judy’s part to just come. There was nothing much besides a few seated poses that she could really do and everywhere all around her, healthy people happily stretched and practiced. Yet there she was.

Judy made it to about six more classes after that. Her last class, she fell face-first down onto the ground from a standing forward fold. I had watched this fall happen many times in my dreams only in reality thankfully, she didn’t die like in my visions. Fortunately, she was not seriously injured in the fall and happened to have a licensed RN practicing next her who stabilized her enough to get her to lean against the wall for the remainder of the class. Afterwards it took nearly 30 minutes to get her from the studio out to her ride. There was no denying that this would be the last class.

I saw her one more time when I went to visit her at home the last week in Hospice care. She died a few days later on June, 3rd 2007. There is a bench at the top of Holly Park near her home in San Francisco honoring her life.

This post is dedicated to Judy, my mom who has fought brain cancer and is currently cancer free and to the many yoga students who drag or have drug themselves to class in the middle of chemotherapy hell and have the strongest and most focused practice imaginable. Thanks for the lessons in courage.

About Judy:
Judy Garlow was a longtime director of the State Bar program to fund legal services for the poor in California. After the federal government cut legal aid funding in the 1980s, she got involved in a new program to help subsidize the programs, which offer free lawyers or legal advice to low-income people in areas such as housing, welfare and domestic violence.

Bench at Holly Park